WASHINGTON—Let me tell you something I know for certain. Listen, for this thing is true. There is a rookie U.S. Senator named Josh Hawley. He comes from Missouri and he is a Republican. He replaced MSNBC’s Claire McCaskill, who was a nominal Democrat, because Missouri is one of those states that has steadily lost its mind over the last two decades, which we’re not supposed to notice because it is impolite to all those nice people who carried the prion disease into our politics. Anyway, in a town full of thirsty people, Josh Hawley is a man crawling across the Kalahari. And this is the thing that I know for certain. The most dangerous place to stand in Washington D.C. is any place between Senator Josh Hawley and a live microphone….
Around midday on Wednesday, there was a bank of microphones and an exaltation of television cameras in the basement of the Capitol, where the little trams disgorge senators on their way to the chamber from their various office buildings. This is prime quote-stalking territory, even with the ludicrous restrictions that have been put in place, especially for these impeachment days. The microphones and cameras had been lined up for a scheduled press conference with the House managers of the impeachment trial. They were running a little late. Meanwhile, Hawley got off the tram, spotted the microphones and cameras, and reacted like a wolverine in a meat locker. His closing speed was nothing short of stunning. He was already at full boil by the time he’d reached his mark.
The people in the first rows of the galleries leaned over a little further, and the people in the rows behind them stretched and craned their necks. Down and to Schiff’s left, Mitch McConnell was holding the arms of his chair so tightly that his knuckles went bloodless and his lips were clenched tighter than his fingers were. You could not have pulled a pin out of McConnell’s ass with a tractor.
It was only a moment, and it passed, and McConnell soon slipped back into the placid mien of The Man Who Has The Votes. But the president* is guilty as sin, and they all know it, and they all know they can’t do anything about it because more senators don’t want to do anything about than do want to do anything about it. But the president* is as guilty as Jesse James, and they all know it. Every one of them knows it. They have to decide if they can live with that knowledge, and the tragedy is that they get to decide whether we have to live with it, too.
In which Claire McCaskill calls out Bernie Sanders’ socialism and forces us to compliment Mark Halperin.
….Missouri Senator Claire McCaskill, whose appeal to liberals beyond Not Being A Republican I never will understand, was there, and they were asking her about the mini-sensation that Bernie Sanders is causing out on the hustings these days….
….What came next was a real shock. Mark Halperin asked McCaskill for three policy positions held by Sanders that she would call Socialist positions. McCaskill’s gob was utterly smacked….
….Another reason not to like Claire McCaskill: She just made the staff at the Cafe compliment Mark Halperin.
Now you’ve gone and done it. That last one is beyond the pale.
….But McCaskill has proven herself to be a genuinely Liebermanesque menace. She’s the one that needs watching when the tough votes come up next year. I think she’d sell the party for parts in exchange for three points in the next Gallup Poll of Missouri….
Santa Bentivolo, Jim (Dumber Than Inhofe and Coburn Combined) Bridenstine, Market Stabilizer Yoho, Freedom Fries Jones, Insane The Greater Gohmert, Pit Of Hell Broun, Amazing Grace Southerland, Chinese Microchips Hartzler, Insane The Lesser Bachmann, and on and on. How did the House clerk ever find enough crayons….
This, in reference to a letter signed by thirty-two members of the House teabagger caucus “calling on President Obama to ask for Secretary of Health and Human Services Kathleen Sebelius’s resignation.”