10. Buy Mega Millions tickets constantly, blame the left when you lose, say you didn’t really wanna win anyways.
9. Raise money for friends, tomorrow’s the deadline.
8. Put your “David Atchison is worse than Rush Limbaugh” argument into a thesis format.
7. Tell more stories of your father’s veterinary experience and how it makes you a women’s health expert.
6. Figure out if bringing the Hunger Games to Missouri counts as a jobs bill
5. Prank Call Orly, see if she blames Obama
4. Figure out how you’ll get the Missouri House featured in the ‘lame stream media’ this week
3. Check the betting line on the James Higgins/Leonard Steinman Libertarian primary.
2. Figure out if the War on Religion includes holding Baseball’s Opening Day on Good Friday
1. Pantsless party
for the benefit of a certain leader who shall go nameless